Emotional Fall

I felt like Autumn.
Cold winds and sweeping rain
Found the cracks which had appeared.
I felt like I was withering, wilting.
Losing the essence despite
Despite all efforts to cling 
To the watery rays of the disappearing sun.

I felt like Winter.
I had seen Winter fast approaching from a long way off
And now it was here.
Winter, creeping through dank darkness.
Despair rising from the inner core,
Meeting the decay of surface debris.
Then the frost.
The frozen, clinical, sharpened frost,
Cleansing me with painful relief,
Robbing disease and decay of their evolution.

I felt like Spring.
Stilled by the shock of Winter,
I felt the rejuevanating touch of Spring.
New growth being nutured.
Glimpses of good times ahead,
If you can endure the spontanious frost revisiting.
Time of reflecting and regrowth.
Time for healing.

I'm beginning to feel like Summer.......

Suzie Dunnington's Questions:

1.  As this is the first time I have ever submitted anything anywhere, I would like to ask if the poem makes sense.  Does it reflect an emotional journey?

2.  In the 2nd stanza, I don't really want to say "from a long way off"  but something that would suggest my knowledge of the existance of winter prior to my actual experience of it.

3.   3rd stanza - I would like to imply here how quickly and without notice the frost can return - how set backs can happen when you least expect them.  I don't think this is said very well at all.

Kind Regards,

Suzie Dunnington, East Yorkshire, ENGLAND

Down in the Trenches

Shadows of life are dark tonight.
Gathered souls of dying men, set free.
Evening sky blood lit and flaming.
Wind stirring smoke.
Satanic Brew in the heavens.
Shadows of life are dark tonight.

Time, a lost possession.
Men mechanically fight.
Sanith shut down for protection.
Pain and disease abundant.
Memories of civility shrinking.
Reality scarce.
Shadows of life are dark tonight.
Shadows of life.......
Shadows.....

Suzie Dunnington's Questions:

1.   I would like to know if the poem creates imagery of the 1st World War andif the poem is atmospheric.

2.   Does the end of the poem work?  Repeating lines, I'm told, can be a bit twee. However, I wanted to give some impression of fading and so I thought perhaps I could use this style.

Kind Regards,

Suzie Dunnington, East Yorkshire, ENGLAND