Venial Spirit on the Food Chain There is a tingling at the top of my skull in my hair-part, that could be a crack in my brain. My fingers are wet, my only soul leaking out, the slime trail an alarm I should heed. But in the wail a shadow is creeping in faster than I can pray, spinning in the hole a spider's web. I cringe at her leggy probe, her squatting over my jellyfish and her spurt of seeds. Have I been chosen, or am I in exile in this death-festival of exposure? In perpetuity I dream a fly agaric purging god, and myself a mollusk to lay open as angel feed.
Elizabeth Warren's Questions:
Is it clear what this poem is "about?" Is it too obscure or, at the other
extreme, too obvious?
Comments on the structure? I'm not a fan of "rigid" form, but I like a poem
>that has some shape to it.
Comments on the images: slime trail, jellyfish, fly agaric...? I'm not thrilled with the line "Have I been chosen, or am I in exile," any thoughts?
Anne Sexton/To Echo It is difficult to assess your madness; your insanity glimmering, the blinding sun of your mirrored eyes. I know you are fashionably maniacally depressed, and the pills you allude to are eagerly swallowed. I know you are dead. One afternoon you suffer a psychotic split and suddenly veer from North to South. Fouccault pendulums clinging to the walls and singing like sprung wires as the earth spins around, you turn your brains inside out for an analyst who you want to sleep with, all the others you can ascribe to addiction, for which you take medication. It's not pretty to watch a duel for a nod, a battle to get up in the morning- your body an unwilling servant and there are no more prescriptions.
Elizabeth Warren's Questions:
Is the subject corny/cliche/trendy, i.e. are you "put off" when you read
the title?
Is it clear or too obvious that I am talking about Anne Sexton to another
person who is "crazy?"
Does the form (lack of) work? Does the ending work?