The Muse Lay with me, love. Lay long along me, hand in mine Cool as sea-glass fleshed upon my couch As lovers lie in Hedon. Where dreamers drift aged And wake in taught youth and sinew, snaked As we once wound limb and tendril - a Single sentient soul. I never knew yours from mine (but that) until you Moved above me like some ancient dream Unfolds its line and form and symetry - spiced skin Dry and hot, oh, afternoon or dawn, Just come and keep me from my writing, Love - the burning leaf of paper dropped from your lips to mine.
Cheryl L. Higgins's Questions:
Query "Hedon" is a place I made up. Not "Eden", it is the land of Hedon,
or hedonism. Does that work?
Is it "ok" to make up a place, well, of course I can make up anything I please, but does a reader "get" it? Did you?
Also, is the poem its self a little too obscure, or can it be devined what is being written about?
I have had several readers say "Huh?" and I am a little unable to see something outside of my own eyes; either they weren't looking to read poetry that isn't "in your face" in style, or else I am too "out there" in my romance....