Guest Poet Christopher M. Massey
For The Moment
on normal days, two bits and silver skin
catches light
shimmering the singing sun
and spinning, and
dancing
with honey rays
soon answered by the shining water sound.
today, quiet clouds and muffled sun
silence light
the singing sun is hoarse from
whispering, and
sighing
with darkened voice
the sole response a dusty thump.
this well, my heart, is empty.
December, 1997
Christopher M. Massey's Questions:
1) Does the poem read well?
2) Are the images strong enough to make the poem at least somewhat universal?
3) Is the ending alright, or is it trite?
Correspond with Christopher M. Massey at
cmassey@ott.net
with your ideas about this poem.
Empty Is The Pit
slivered silvered moon and starry sky
cast pale memory across your skin
my smile fades to ache
crawling gnawing emptiness
I am alone
the choice has been made and it is right
but, God, I want to touch you
once I could take comfort
in your gaze, your taste, your touch
solace in your skin
refuge from the darkness
but losing you is the emptiness
we are alone
this choice to part and follow paths
is true, I know, and right
for us, as friends
yes
yet still the pit of my being
is empty.
December, 1997
Christopher M. Massey's Questions:
First of all, I am new to poetry. I have never studied or taken a course (save that provided in reading). Secondly, I have only been writing for a few months, at best. Because of these, I'm not really sure what questions to ask. Please bear with me if my questions seem a bit immature, for I am truly a child in this medium. With that in mind...
A)How does the poem read? Comment on flow, etc.
B)The poem comes from real life experiences. Does it read too much like I'm putting my diary on display? Is that a bad thing?
Thank you in advance for any comments!
http://www.ott.net/~cmassey
Correspond with Christopher M. Massey at
cmassey@ott.net
with your ideas about this poem.
The Albany Poetry Workshop