Featured Guest Poet C.T. Alexander
His Highness
Shaved thin and sound
is the ground
of faith
by his highness.
We trump, we bow
Only to allow
the king his holy pass.
He Treads upon the feet
of those who eat
his grime
And his shame.
Glee to the courts,
And Money to the ports
Our highness is
So Kind.
Oh lovely scene,
oh a beautiful sight,
For Our King is so bright
With thought
and love.
For All his People.
September, 2001
C.T. Alexander's Questions:
Hello, I am a young 16 year old poet, wanting some help with this poem.
What should I do with it?
Thanking you
Okay, first (and again these are only suggestions): write about what you know, the experiences of your OWN life, and second, avoid vague language that is centuries outdated like "faith" and "shame" and "kind" and third, avoid rhyme for awhile; it is more difficult than it looks and if not done really really well, it can make the whole poem seem like a journal entry than an attempt at a work of Art, and fourth, who is the speaker? who is the "we" and why should we, the readers, care? How can we, the readers, relate to this seemingly abstract concept? and lastly, don't try to put a message into your poem; it shouldn't be didactic. show the reader an image, a slice from your OWN life, and the message will be whatever the reader gets from it.
His Highness
Shaved thin and sound
is the ground
of faith
by his highness.
We trump, we bow
Only to allow
the king his holy pass.
He Treads upon the feet
of those who eat
his grime
And his shame.
Glee to the courts,
And Money to the ports
Our highness is
So Kind.
Oh lovely scene,
oh a beautiful sight,
For Our King is so bright
With thought
and love.
For All his People.
Matthew
New Orleans, LA USA - Sat Oct 13 10:24:58 2001
Hi Chris. Sounds like Matthew wants the 'juice'. Me too. I guess we all do. You know, puppy-dog vs. porcelain vase; vases can be pretty, but puppies, we can feel--make a connection with. And, I've heard it too, "write what you know." (I don't think it really applies here, though.) But, when you think about it, what do any of us REALLY know? (This is nasty, but I thought, "Walt Whitman's pages would all be blank.") Anyway, your poem is a 'porcelain vase'. So, your question was, what can you do with it? Well, you could put it in the 'spotlight'--scoot it all over to the center of the page. (Give it prominence.) And, you could 'polish' it up--make it look pretty. Maybe start each line with a capital letter. Even, 'bold' the first letter of each stanza. If you're feeling flamboyant, enlarge the font of the bolden letters. I think it's a pretty poem. The rhyme and meter sound fine. Speaking of rhyme, I TOTALLY disagree with Matthew. I think it's a matter of personal choice. If you want to rhyme: rhyme. Lastly, you're 16 years old--spilling your soul can be a scary thing for a teenager. Until you're ready to share your feelings, 'vases' are good practic--keep up the good work! (Hi Matthew)
Wanda Kay
USA - Tue Oct 16 06:09:48 2001