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Guest Poet Liz Leidel


You frame me; form following form;
mine following yours,
which is an unmarked path in an unmarked land.
The secret slopes I discover as you sleep
while you just lie there waiting patiently
to be colonized.
I've stopped and set up camp in your embrace
so that I may survey my new surroundings
and even if I depart I've left my mark
for neither territory nor explorer will escape untouched.
Expeditions such as these do not allow for an easy withdrawal
and such a sturdy frame is hard to break.
You frame me; form following form;
mine becoming yours.

June, 2002

Liz Leidel's questions:

is the comparison too cliche?

are there any expressions that are lacking (ie-make verbs more active, make adjectives more descriptive or fresh)

are there any blatant breaks in the flow of the poem?

how affective is the alliteration? have i gone overboard?

....and of course anything else you have to add. dont be afraid to be harsh. i will be very appreciative.


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